Monthly Archives: May 2011

Ritual Coffee Roasters- San Francisco

From the throne I can just see,

my face in the mirror peering back at me.

Now I can know the expressions I make,

but that’s an opportunity I just couldn’t take.

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Some Church – Montgomery, AL

A guy named Jack* once had to wee,

as he often did,  so God decreed.

But this is what he really wants to know:

is it a sin using His parking lot to go?

*name changed ’cause it’s a true story!


Philz Coffee- San Francisco

Just when I thought, sadly,

the days of  graffiti were through,

into my life comes this lav,

to make my cave-painting dreams come true!

So ‘scuse me if I take awhile,

in this wall-reader’s Shangri-La.

Think I’ll add my own bit of wisdom:

“I didn’t buy, but rented the java!”


La Trappe Cafe – San Francisco

The basis of Art Nouveau is the wispy whiplash line,

as Mucha so superbly demonstrates.

But no matter how much I wiggle on the seat,

I can’t get my pee-stream to replicate!


Dynamo Donuts – San Francisco

Cool Like Donuts

I unroll the toilet paper, fashion myself a crown,

and continue on to create a toilet paper gown.

I’m looking pretty spiffy

but things might get a bit iffy

when this fabulous sugar rush crashes down.


Air Force Academy Hospital- Colorado Springs

I never before worried

about dying in the can.

But now I only want to pee here

lest a nurse needs to lend a hand.


The Original Pancake House – Los Angeles

Their buckwheat pancakes are the best,

Before leaving I always come here to rest.

But never do I really need to go-

those pancakes seem to quench the flow.